Rob Lawrence

Don't Look Back In Anger

Well..... I apologise for my language but if I'm honest this past year has been a total fucking shit show. I would struggle to create a piece of fiction that is on par with what's happened to us over the past 12 months...... I mean you couldn't make it up, could you?

I look back and I just don't know..... it's difficult to make sense of it all. On one hand, it seems to have gone in a quick blur but on the other, it's been a full year and that's a long time.... an age.

What I do know though is that everything has changed...... everything.

Will things go back to "normal?"

What do you say?

It's not been an easy trip. There's a lot of us that feel we've been living in some sort of anxiety bubble unable to get any rest bite or relaxation. Everywhere we turn it's focused on the pandemic.

It seems there's always something new to be worried about or a new set of rules you have to get used to..... and that doesn't even start to explain the pain of not being able to see our loved ones for a full year.

And..... For some of those less fortunate, it's been nothing short of traumatic and life-changing. This needs to be acknowledged.

Yes in the bigger picture I know I've been really lucky to have been working and had the support of my other half but like I explain to all my counselling clients It's important to acknowledge your truth and your lived experiences regardless of how worse your next-door neighbour might of had it.

It's our lives..... and to us it's important.

One common theme that I talk to my clients about is this sense of a new normal. We've all had to be fearful of others, of crowds, of getting too close..... We've learnt to be on our own.

It's understandable, it's fine BUT

This Is The Problem

This isn't normal. There's nothing normal about being isolated from our friends and family, being scared of human contact and not being able to go outside.

And now that the reality is it's nearly over, the hard work starts for us all. We're all gonna have to fight against everything we've learnt over the past year to get us back to where we were before this all began.

We're gonna have to learn how to be social again... Learn to be around people, groups of friends and other crowded environments,

I for one cannot wait but I'm gonna have to work for it. I've developed some small level of social anxiety over the past year and although I'm not gonna let it stop me from getting out and about I'm gonna have to learn to sit with the uncomfortableness of that social anxiety for quite a while.

Fuck Social Anxiety

It's a fight that I can't lose though..... There is no plan B and there's no alternative. I'm not living in isolation, fear or loneliness any more.

It's so important for our mental wellness that we start enjoying life again. It's important that whatever we choose to do for our downtime, relaxation and rest bite we start doing again.

So.....

If your thing is a pint after work... Go!

If you wanna shop... Go!

The gym?... Go do some super sets

Family and friends? Go see em 😉

At the start, it's going to be uncomfortable but try to be ok with that uncomfortableness. Change is never easy and takes time but that feeling will go and after a while, you'll realise why what you're doing is important for you.

Take it slow... It's ok. Don't put too much pressure on yourself and show yourself a bit of self-love and forgiveness.

At the very least try and find comfort knowing that you're not alone with this. More people than you think will be going through the exact same thing and maybe if you OK enough with talking about yourself why not open up to someone and share your journey.